Stephen asked me to post a recap of what happened to me this Saturday night, so I will. A friend of mine had an engagement party in Augusta. Open bar, black dudes serving everybody in tuxedos, pretty nice. I decide that I'm too good to drink beer since they're serving Crown for free. Mistake. The party went fine, as I actually remember leaving. Afterwards, everyone decides to go to the new Irish pub that just opened up around the corner. Keep in mind that one of my cousins owns the joint, so they treat us pretty well. As some on the board know about me, when I get enough of the whiskey in me, my body decides when it's sleepy time, and it doesn't matter where or what I'm doing. So at some point, I venture into the bathroom and lock myself in there. The bathroom is a single, one toilent, sink, pretty cozy. It's now nap time. Fast forward to about 4:30 in the morning when I awoke from my slumber. I walk out to find the lights out, doors locked, everyone gone. You would think I coud just walk out of there, but that is not the case. The doors are dead-bolted. I start to panic. I look at my phone, and of course I had about 30 missed calls as people were looking for me, but nobody thought to look in the bathroom. I make myself a coke, and start looking through drawers for a key. All I find is the cash drawer which is totally unlocked. Not good. Luckily I decide that it wouldn't be a good idea to touch the money that's staring me in the face. Finally, I get in touch with my brother Dennis. He is about to call my dad, which would not have been cool. I venture my way to the back and find a door I can unlock. Freedom. I close the door behind me and haul ass back to my aunt's where I was supposed to be staying. I'm sure the cops were called in when they opened for business on Sunday as the back door was unlocked, and I left all the lights on. Whiskey is a wicked mistress that I cannot tame.
1 comment:
I can't believe this actually happens outside of sitcoms or movies. My hat is off to you, sir.
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