Monday, October 13, 2008

I'm Still Not Stimulated

I overheard a few analysts on CNN earlier today talking about Congress' plan to pass a 2nd economic stimulus bill (since the first one did its job so well). I've explained numerous times on here why such initiatives aren't helpful. Government can't create wealth; it can only transfer it from Peter to Paul.

Anyway, this Democratic commentator on CNN mentioned how we need another stimulus bill that will "rebuild our crumbling infrastructure" (Is it really crumbling? Diamond Causeway and Truman look just fine to me. Hm. Whatever.), constructing new bridges and dams that will "create thousands of new, good-paying jobs" during these tough times, just like during the New Deal.

This proposal got me thinking: if "job creation" is the ultimate goal here, why don't we pass a bill that calls for the construction of 10 (or 100?) new dams in the Potomac River around Washington D.C. And let's pay each worker that helps build these new dams an annual salary of...say...$300,000 per year. Seems well-paying enough. And...oh yeah, instead of allowing the workers to use productive, high-powered industrial equipment like bulldozers and cranes, let's say they can only use...spoons. That way lots of new jobs would be required, and we'd really be able to get this economy going!!

In addition to the dams, we could build hundreds of new bridges too. And parks. And monuments. And pyramids. This would eliminate joblessness and the economy would really get a good jolt! Times might be tough now but it's okay because Washington can save us all with full employment by creating millions and billions and gazillions of new jobs! Who's with me?

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