Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Get Rich Quick Scheme #346

Have you noticed how loosely the word "tycoon" is thrown around these days? What exactly is a tycoon anyways? And how does one become a tycoon?

Historically, "tycoon" has simply been an arbitrary title given to your run-of-the-mill billionaire. Not anymore. My plan is to establish an international tycoon registry board. The board would define criteria for attaining tycoon status and bestow the title only upon deserving individuals.

The way I see it, you would only need to get one high-profile client. Then, the rest would follow in order to "keep up with the Jones's."

3 comments:

HANK said...

I propose that the first "tycoon" in your registry should be none other than Arvind "Honey Mustard" Raman. After snagging my driver's license when I was obviously intoxicated, Arvind high-tailed it to Mexico City where the ID was "definitely most probably" sold on the black market to a Columbian drug lord.

Patrick said...

Some would argue that Mr. Tiger Woods fits such criteria. Not only is he loaded, but his mother is Thai and his father is African-American.

Pinkie said...

I fail to see how Arvind would qualify for tycoon status simply because he stole your ID and sold it in Mexico. The fact that he likes honey mustard is also irrelevant in this discussion.