Friday, April 20, 2007

Harry Reid and "Low Carb" Food: The Enemies Amongst Us

First of all, I would like to thank Pat for the invite to join BMBS. It is an honor and a privilege and I will work zealously to advance our common causes.
Now, here is what is gnawing at my brain this week:

1. Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, and the new Democratic oligarchy - one that has decided to conduct it's own foreign policy separate from the legitimately elected, constitutionally entitled Bush Administration. As though Squeaker Pelosi's self-appointed diplomatic mission to Syria was not enough (which ended in disaster, by the way), we now have Harry Reid proudly declaring defeat in Iraq.
This should surprise no one. The Democrats gave up on this war before it even began. As it stands now, the troop surge has only been halfway implemented. Let's see what happens and craft a meaningful strategy before we snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.
The Left loves to compare Iraq to Vietnam. The only viable comparison between the two conflicts is their defeatist attitude. We can only lose this war if we allow ourselves to do so. By allowing Iraq to become an unstable haven for fundamentalists we would essentially be undermining the sacrfices of 3,000 of our finest. Thanks for speaking for us, Harry.

2. There is a new, revolting spin on the recent Low Carb diet craze. As though Al Gore's Oscar buzz, "carbon footprints", hybrid cars, and Earth Day aren't enough to make me lose my lunch, now my actual lunch might make me lose my lunch. There is a new movement among the green Left to reduce your Carbon "Food"print. That's right. This new "Low Carb" diet is not necessarily low in carbohydrates - it has a low "carbon footprint". The Greenie Weenies now want us to consider the amount of greenhouse gasses emitted by the production and distribution of various foods that we eat.

a) Upside: The new diet is largely centered around reducing transatlantic flights and so forth, which actually promotes domestically produced and distributed foods. Good for farmers and the American food industry.

b) Downside: It is exceptionally gay. And it has serious health implications. Imagine taking a date to Applebee's or some fine American dining establishment like that, and she asks the waitress which meal has the lowest carbon footprint. Not only would you immediately regurgitate your basket of onion peels, but you would quite literally suffocate in the ensuing cloud of Smug that drifts across the table.

That's enough for one day. I Democrat.

PS Harry Reid could learn something:
-To sit back hoping that someday, some way, someone will make things right is to go on feeding the crocodile, hoping he will eat you last - but eat you he will. Ronald Reagan

3 comments:

Joe said...

Carbon footprint food. If this is such a big deal, I'm surprised they aren't going after The Varsity, Krystal, and every Mexican restaurant in America. I know that by dining at any one of those places, I'm sure to emit some greenhouse gases of my own.

Ryan said...

I haven't even finished reading the second paragraph yet. Chris proves his worth already just by using the word "oligarchy."

Chris said...

aw crap. I used the word "viable" in two consecutive sentences. I knew it wasn't reading properly but I couldn't figure out why.