Vox Populi: Gems of the Week

This was a ho-hum week for Vox Populi. Last week kind of spoiled us. Here you go, folks. Enjoy.

Notable Mention:
"Who had the nerve to cut Judge Judy's television program in half?"
- This call probably came from a nursing home. I feel bad for old people; there’s no good TV on during the day.

Notable Mention:
"Congratulations, Georgia Bulldogs. You're 4 and 0, just as I expected."
- I will post every submission about the Georgia Bulldogs I see.

Notable Mention:
"Steve Spurrier, would you like some cheese to go with that whine? Go Dawgs."
- I can picture this in my mind. This message was slurred into a cell phone in the Coaches Corner parking lot around 2:30am. Good stuff.

Dishonorable Mention:
"I will be voting against any incumbent on any ballot until every single person in office right now is out of office."
- Sweet.

Dishonorable Mention:
"Another weekday morning, and I'll be late because train cars are blocking President Street again. When is the City Council going to get some backbone and pass an ordinance prohibiting this during rush hour?"
- There’s your first mistake: looking to the government for help. Why not just write the train company yourself? "No way. That would mean I'd have to do stuff."

Third Runner-up:
"After the SPLOST voter turnout, I am more convinced than ever that the people of Chatham County are both ignorant and lazy."
- You could have figured that out just by reading Vox Populi.

Second Runner-up:
"The pond at Montgomery Crossroads and Truman Parkway could be made into a very beautiful site with very little money and a little labor."
- That pond is there for drainage, you dumbass. For the past couple weeks, callers have been complaining that the scenery around the Truman and Chatham Parkways is not very pretty. Here’s an idea for the Vox contributors: instead of looking around at the pretty scenery, watch where you’re going. I’ll bet money that the same people calling in to complain about the scenery are the same assholes switching lanes without looking and going 35 in the left lane.

First Runner-up:
"Someone else had a bad experience at a Savannah hospital. The noise where I stayed was awful. There was no consideration for the patient to recover. The doctor wondered why I wanted to leave and go home. It was too stressful being in the hospital. Please nurses and staff, have a bit of kindness for the patient."
- Listen, you’re not at the fucking Hilton, you’re at a HOSPITAL. It’s not the staff’s job to make you comfortable. Furthermore, I’ll bet this person just went to the hospital for a hangnail or diarrhea or something stupid like that. “It was too stressful being in the hospital.” Shut up.

And your Gem of the Week:
"A kayak is an irresponsible place to drink beer."
- Too true. It’s near impossible to stand up and take a leak.

Happy Friday, everyone.