Bad Boys, Bad Boys. Whatchya gonna do?

After another fruitful night at the library, I decided to pedal my candy apple red bike home, via Broad St. and Milledge Ave. I left school at 11:00 p.m., hardly any traffic about. As I briskly made it to Milledge, I started to coast down the suicide lane heading towards Baxter St. No cars in sight. What's this? I hear what seems like a Crown Victoria accelerating up behind me. As I am trying to make room for the car to pass, blue lights flicker about... signaling me to pull over. Like any car would do when being pulled over by the cops, I slowed down and turned off the road.
The officer told me to slowly get off my bike, keeping my hands where he can see them. After I put my bike on the sidewalk, I began to pull off my bookbag. The officer got real excited and said "Halt! What sort of parcels are in your bag?" I explained to him that I was on my way home from the library, so of course I was carrying only books. Not only was I wearing seer suckered shorts, but Athens is home to 10,000 other students who frequently ride bikes with bookbags. What else would I be carrying?
He requested my ID, then very systematically inspected my speed demon bike. At that point, I still believed that I had been pulled over for riding in the suicide lane. Nope, the officer explained to me that I did not have "sufficient equipment" on my bike. I said, "oh, so I need to have more reflectors on my bike?" The officer answered "No, you must have electric lights on both the front and back of your vehicle, sir."
Well, he only gave me a warning. The cop wasted our tax dollars on pulling over a college kid riding a bike home. Could I really unsuspectedly run over an old lady at 11:00 pm with my vicious mountain bike? What an asshole.
Think about it, there were at least 2,000 kids last night walking into bars with fake ids, and this f%#$@* decides to pull a bicycler over on Milledge... for a warning.