Don't know if any of you saw this on the front page of Espn yesterday, but it's still on the golf page. The headline:
Tiger vs. Federer: Tiger Woods and Roger Federer each added another trophy for the mantle on Sunday, which got us to thinking: Which athlete is more dominant?
Um, this got ME thinking: Never compare some headband-wearing, white-shorts-sporting guy who is good at a HOBBY to Tiger Woods. Okay, tennis is something that rich housewives pay young trainers to teach them so they can bang them later in the garage. Roger Federer is not "dominant," ok? He's just lucky enough to hit a dog's chew toy over a big fishnet in the right spots every once in a while.
Success in golf requires meticulous training, endless self-evaluation, complete control over every muscle of your body, a balance of strength and finesse - all to put a tiny ball in a tiny hole the most efficient way possible. Tennis? You run between a couple of squares, grunting like some whore in heat, as you engage in what is undoubtedly the most uninteresting game for a spectator to watch. I'd rather watch someone play video games for three hours. And no "sport" can be taken seriously when one of its point positions is called "love."
I hate that tennis is considered a valid sport worthy of television coverage, product endorsements, manufactured celebrity status, etc. You don't see any racquetball on ESPN or Sportscenter, do you? Why not? It's the same goddamn thing, except its faster and more exciting. Sure, I enjoy playing racquetball when I get the chance (6 years ago after school), so I probably wouldn't dislike playing tennis. But don't give one goddamned second of air time or printed word covering tennis or bike-riding. They are just HOBBIES.
5 comments:
This is dumb. Tennis is a sport worthy of TV coverage. Federer beat the hell out of Roddick and didn't lose a set the ENTIRE open. He is damn good at what he does. I think the question ESPN poses is stupid.
"Who is more dominant, Peyton Manning or Roger Clemens?
"Lebron James or Jimmy Johnson?"
It is hard to get that good at tennis, just like its hard to get that good at golf, football, or any other sport. Sorry Ryan, you're wrong about this.
I hate Roger Federer. I also hate that sissy little "I can't believe it" fall he does everytime he wins. It reminds me of Ernie McCracken from King Pin.
Roddick should've just beat him up in the parking lot.
Roddick is from Panama City, Florida. There is no way I would ever take him in a fight against anyone.
Both are hard. I suck at golf, and I'm even worse at tennis.
Either way, we need to cut taxes.
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